Day 114 & 115

So...I've been gone...Here I am. I HAVE to get back into the habit of blogging. Here is yesterday's (which I thought was today's) and today's.

Day 114: This JUST happened to me...like literally. I usually feel like I don't get caught up in chasing the world and its pleasures TOO MUCH, that I kinda have it under control at times. But yesterday, it was interesting to watch myself get OBSESSED within a matter of HOURS once something was just MENTIONED in my life. And I wanted it badly, lustfully, deeply. I'm still working out with the Lord what my motivations are, why I am so drawn to the idea, but the thing is, no matter how many HEALTHY motivations there are, I am still being drawn to it in an obsessive, unhealthy, worldly way as well...and today, after I've woken up, I am ready to say, "Wash that away Lord...as you alone have willed!"

I think this passage alone is critical to understanding not only Solomon but also his ultimate downfall. It's pretty serious stuff...the pursuit of worldly things...and there are so many fine lines. That's why today I realize how important (once again) it is that we are individually and daily surrendered to the Lord's desires alone.

Day 115: This is one of my favorite passages in the world; a beautiful portrait of what true community looks like, a picture of what we all need in our life. Today what I realized all over again, though, as a I read it was that each part of this description of Godly friendship and companionship requires humility and selflessness. So often we sit back, asking why we don't have the kind of connection described here, instead of asking where we could use more humility, where we could be more selfless in the lives of those around us. God, grant me humility (ouch!) and Lord, please make me selfless (double-ouch ouch).